Conflict is a normal part of any relationship, but there are practical ways to avoid it.  Here are some tips to help you avoid conflict in your relationship to keep you together through hard times.

1. Listen to your partner.  Conflict arises from miscommunication and misunderstanding.  This is prevented by listening to your partner not only superficially but on a deeper level as well.  Pay attention to both words and actions.  When talking with your partner, check whether you have understood your partner correctly.  Repeat what your partner has said, clarify unclear points, let your partner expand what he has said, etc.  If your partner doesn’t want to speak, give him space and talk when he’s comfortable communicating with you.
2. Spend time with your partner.  Not spending time with your partner gives him a feeling that he is neglected, but spending too much time with him makes him feel smothered.  The trick is to pay attention to how your partner reacts when you are doing things with him.  There are some activities for which he likes your presence, other activities for which he likes to be with other people and times when he wants to be left alone.  In times when he likes your companionship, spend quality time, no matter how infrequent.
3. Respect your partner.  You and your partner are in a relationship because you want to meet your needs.  The most important of these needs is to feel important.  If you don’t respect your partner, be ready for conflict to happen.  Respect your partner’s personality, tastes, beliefs, and the things that are important to him.
4. Respect yourself.  Hold yourself in high regard and assert yourself when necessary.  Avoiding conflict doesn’t mean you relinquish all control to your partner.  If you don’t respect yourself, don’t expect that your partner will respect you.  A healthy self-confidence is attractive to all, and this makes you more loveable.  A wimpy personality is irritable and invites all sorts of conflict.
5. Be sensitive.  Be sensitive to your partner, but more especially to yourself.  Know who you are and why you feel the things that you do.  Understanding yourself makes it easier to comprehend other people, especially your partner.  Know the things that are important to you.  Dhttp://www.goc.vn/wp-admin/post-new.phpoing so guides your actions in your relationship.
6. Solve problems constructively.  Focus on problematic points in your relationship and discuss them with your partner constructively.  Choose a time and place that both of you are comfortable with.  Build an atmosphere of trust.   See each other’s point of view before defending your position.  Seek other people’s help if necessary.
7. Don’t push your partner to change.  Your partner’s identity is important to him.  If you want him to change for the sake of your relationship, he may lash out and think of leaving.  Make compromises.  If this is not possible, end the relationship to save plenty of heartache later on.
8. Don’t promise that you’ll change for your partner.  You may not be able to meet your partner’s expectations no matter how hard you try.  By being submissive, he’ll lose respect for you and seek a more valuable mate elsewhere.  Discuss things rationally and come up with a win-win situation.  If you desire to change, do so not by words but through actions and he’ll do the same.
9. Don’t pressure your partner into loving you.  No one wants to be forced to feel an emotion, especially the delicate feeling of love.  Let love come naturally; pushing your partner to love you elicits the opposite.

To make a relationship worthwhile, both of you must be happy.  If only one person is benefiting in the relationship, or if both of you are suffering, the relationship is sure to be conflict-ridden.  Seek a balance in your relationship and constantly renew your feelings for each other.

Source: www.howtodothings.com

Instructions

• One of the most romantic wedding proposals I’ve heard of was carried thru by a couple of friends. The first thing you’d do is look for an antique or very old looking bottle.

• For your perfect wedding proposal, plan a walk on the beach. She may even expect a proposal, but that’s o.k.., she’ll never see THIS coming. Pick someone to be your look-out, preferably someone she doesn’t know yet so she won’t spot them. They will strategically place the bottle, with engagement ring inside, somewhere on the beach to appear as if it washed ashore and then make sure no one else finds it first.

• Before your special event, go with your friend who will be acting as the lookout and plan exactly where you will be walking with your beloved. Use some thing as point of reference so you won’t forget. The more remote the better. Coordinate with your look out, as close as possible, the time you’ll be there so they don’t have to hang out for hours.

• As you walk down the beach hopefully she will notice the bottle. If she doesn’t you can comment, “Hey what’s that over there?” as you approach from a distance walk one step behind her so she gets their first to pick it up.

• When she picks it up and sees what’s inside, its up to you to describe the love you have for her and convince her to spend the rest of her life with you.YOU can make it a perfect wedding proposal! <By hlthychoclitnut , eHow.com>
  

Spending sleepless nights with curious cameramen

To prove, or disprove Thai Ngoc’s claim, camera crews from around the world have arrived at his doorstep to document his every move, 24 hours a day. The filmmakers had to trudge over to the remote district of Nong Son in Central Vietnam and would stay 3 to 5 days.

At night, Ngoc lit up the lamps and continued to do the farm work, i.e. harvesting rice, ploughing the soil, growing potatoes, tending soya bean plants, etc. When the farming work was over, he made baskets and other household utensils. Due to his sleeplessness, Ngoc’s productivity is actually double compared to a normal person.

Surprisingly enough, Ngoc has a normal daily diet and rarely gets sick. People who are curious about his sleeplessness were not able to stay awake all the time while observing him. Ngoc confided: “Before 1975 I discovered I wasn’t sleeping and it never crossed my mind if this condition had adverse affects on my health. To me, sleeping or being awake is the same, and I can work during the daytime or at night.”

Needless to say, the film crews covering him were totally exhausted after their filming. The compensation paid to him for the filming was not much and Ngoc used it to invest in his farms.

A few medical scientists invited Ngoc to go abroad for some research and treatment, but Ngoc refused. “If I got sick due to sleeplessness and could not be cured at home, then I would accept such invitations. But I am quite okay, feeling healthy and working without becoming tired. Thanks to this phenomenon, I have been able to convert an 8ha bare forest into a green productive area,” Ngoc said.

Forests tended with a human love

Ngoc has divided his farms into different plots and on each plot he grows much needed trees,  such as the acacia which is used for making paper, trees to be used for making wood products, such as Do bau(Aquilaria Agallechea), Cho (Parashorea stellata Kury), Sao den (Hopea odorata Roxb), etc. His effort resulted in afforesting the land and protecting rare and valuable trees which are near extinction in Vietnam. Ngoc also built fish ponds during his sleepless nights. He said that on the cloudless, moonlit nights he can work without a lamp as compared to cloudy nights when a kerosene lamp is needed.

“I am so sad when there is no work to do at night,” Ngoc confided. “I just lay down to rest my back and just bide my time smoking and drinking tea until sunrise.” Ngoc added that he has another farm, about 4km away from his house at the foot of Duong Lui Mountain, where he also grows timber.

Not far from his house lives a couple well into their 80′s and for the past 30 years Ngoc has made regular visits to their home, watching over them and assisting with the farm work. Thanks to Ngoc’s sleepless nights, not only his farms, but also this couple’s fields have been protected from damage caused by wild boars.

Ngoc is one of a very few people in the world with this sleepless disorder. For almost half of his lifetime, Ngoc has been awake and it isn’t known how long this can continue. One certain thing that has been acknowledged by many people, i.e., Ngoc has spent his sleepless time doing useful work for his community and co-villagers.

Ngoc’s wife tends to chores around the house and their four children have all grown up and lead normal lives.

Source:vietnam.vnanet.vn

First constructed in 1049 and built on a single

stone pillar just over a metrediameter, this wooden structure was destroyed by the French after their defeat in 1954 and rebuilt by the new government.

Temple of Literature

Dating back to 1070, and considered one of the best preserved and typical examples of traditional Vietnamese architecture, this was the site of Vietnam’s first national university, before it was moved to Hue in 1802.

Hoan Kiem Lake

This large lake is located in the centre of the city, with a small pagoda in the middle. It is enjoyed by residents and tourists alike as a place for relaxation and recreation.

Source: www.visit-mekong.com

Rio de Janeiro of Brazil was chosen here on Friday by the International Olympic Committee (IOC) as the host city of the 2016 Summer Olympic Games.

President of International Olympic Committee Jacques Rogge, President of Rio 2016 Bids Carlos Nuzman and Mayor of Rio de Janeiro Eduardo Paes (L-R) prepare to sign the host city contract after Rio de Janiero was announced as the host city for the 2016 Olympic games in Copenhagen, capital of Danmark, Oct. 2, 2009. (Xinhua/Wu Wei)

IOC President Jacques Rogge made the announcement after three rounds of votes by nearly more than 90 IOC members.

The Brazilian city won the bid after beating rivals Chicago, Tokyo and Madrid.

Chicago was eliminated in the first round of vote as it got the least number of votes among 94 valid votes.

The American city was expected to have a tight race with Rio by the media here, but ended up the first loser.

Tokyo of Japan was squeezed out in the second round of vote with the least number of ballots among 95 valid votes with one abstention.

As many as 106 IOC members as of September 2009, but nationals of the countries of candidate cities are not allowed to vote unless their candidates are eliminated.

In the first round, Madrid won 28 votes, followed by Rio with 26, Tokyo 20 and Chicago 18. In the second round, Rio was on the top with 46, followed by Madrid with 24, Tokyo 20.

Rio won the campaign in the last round after netting 66 votes against Madrid’s 32.

The Rio bid team played economy and geography cards in its final presentation to win the bid.

In a passionate speech, Brazilian President Luiz Inacio Lula daSilva told IOC members that his country is experiencing a “magical moment” of economic development.

Silva, known as Lula, made a strong urge to the voters to choose Rio as the host of a Games.

“I ask for your support and vision. Rio is ready. If you give us this chance, you will not regret,” he appealed, saying that the Brazilian people were full of “passion, energy and creativity”.

He also stressed that Brazil and South America have never hosted an Olympic Games.

“It is time to address this imbalance,” he urged. “I honestly believe it is Brazil’s time. Among the countries that today compete to host the Games, we are the only one that has never had this honor.”

“For others it will be just one more Games,” he noted, “For us, it will be an unparallel opportunity.”

“It will boost the self-esteem of Brazilians” , “consolidate recent achievements” and “inspire new ones”.

He said the bid was not only Brazil’s, but also South America’s, “bid of a continent with almost 400 million men and women and around 180 million youngsters”.

After praising the IOC for its contributions in modernizing the Olympic Games, introducing new sports and new technology, Lula said that “the opportunity is to expand the Olympic Games to new continents.”

South America and Africa are the two continents that have never hosted an Olympic Games, the largest sports event on earth.

Officials of the Rio team detailed construction plans and public security plans of Rio, assuring the voters that the fast developing economy and ensured safety would guarantee a successful Olympic Games.

Brazil has gone all out to win the bid, mobilizing sports stars such as football legend Pele, and famed sports officials, such as FIFA’s Honorary President Joao Havelange.

Havelange called IOC members for support to Rio, welcoming them to go to Rio in 2016 to celebrate his 100th birthday.

The reason for Madrid to last to the third voting round lied mainly in former IOC president Juan Antonio Samaranch’s emotional appealing.

He asked the 100-plus IOC members at the end of Madrid’s final presentation to consider his age and give the chance to Madrid to host the 2016 Games.

“Dear colleagues, I know that I am very near the end on my time. I am, as you know, 89 years old,” he said peacefully.

“May I ask you to consider granting my country the honor and also the duty to organize the games and Paralympics in 2016.”

Source:VietNamNet/Xinhuanet

I always pronounce the Vietnamese soup pho as “foe.” My friend says I’m being culturally insensitive and should make an effort to get it right (she says it’s “fuh”). But people always understand me, so what does it matter anyway? —Fuhgeddaboudit

Dear Fuhgeddaboudit,

Diane Cu, cocreator of the blog White on Rice Couple, says that Vietnamese words are tricky because Vietnamese is a tonal language, with “four or five” main tones and many more regional ones. Although the more common pronunciation of pho is “fuh,” some regions pronounce it more as “foe,” and others in two syllables, Cu says, with a rising tone on the first syllable and a falling tone on the second. Because of the tonal variation, Westerners also struggle with the phrase banh mi. Some erroneously pronounce it as “bang me,” Cu says. Unfortunately, since I couldn’t nail the pronunciation even after hearing it five times, I can’t explain it to you.

There are also regional variations in the pronunciation of Italian food words, says Judy Witts Francini, owner of Divina Cucina, a cooking school in Florence. One difference is that the last syllables of some words, such as mozzarella and braciole, are not pronounced in the south.

But you need not fret too much about regional nuances. The important thing is that you try. At an ethnic restaurant where the servers are from that country, it’s good manners to strive for authentic pronunciation of a foreign food word, as a sign of respect for the culture. If you’re worried about mangling the language and insulting the server, that’s what the numbers on the menu are there for. And you can always ask your server how to pronounce it—so when you return, you’ll be a pro.

That said, there is such a thing as going overboard. If you pronounce “spaghetti” with a flourish or “Croissan’Wich” with your best Parisian flair, then—as Chowhounds have pointed out—you’re going to sound laughably affected.

Typically, the foreign words you’re allowed to take Anglicized liberties with are the ones that wind up in English dictionaries. But what if you don’t have a dictionary on you when placing an order? Sometimes you can just use common sense. As Jesse Sheidlower, the Oxford English Dictionary’s North American editor at large, says, if it’s “on the menu at the Olive Garden,” then chances are it’s as good as white bread.

miznic Sep 30, 2009 07:31AM | link

It’s rare to hear a native Vietnamese speaker pronounce “Pho” as “Foe”, but it does happen.
There are some very distinct Vietnamese tones that are spoken in more rural, areas of Vietnam, where the diacritics are pronounced differently than the more commonly heard tones of the South, Central, and North.

In these rare cases, the rising diacritics don’t necessarily take on a rising tone, but rather, a fluctuating tone with a lowering finish. Even the diacritic that looks a question mark “?” that rests on top of the “O” in “Pho” (called dau hoi ) can often be pronounced flat, resulting in a pronunciation as “foe”.

How do I know this? Because I work with large staff of native Vietnamese speakers who come from all parts of Vietnam. Working and speaking Vietnamese with them has taught me that although there are there are common Viet tones, there are also some unique ones that exist as well.

I’ve learned never to say “never”.

But really, I say, don’t think about it too much, it’s not worth arguing.

If you get close to the pronunciation, that’s great. If you botch it, don’t sweat it. Lord knows I botch the pronunciation of everything outside of my native languages.

Just the fact that a non-Viet chooses to walk into a Vietnamese restaurant and is excited to experience the food is the biggest honor and compliment to the Viet culture and community.

Like my elders tell me– Don’t worry about getting the perfect pronunciation, just slurp it, and eat it all. Enjoy Vietnamese food. You won’t get a spanking for mis-pronunciation, but you will be a big smack for only eating the noodles and leaving all the pho broth behind.

BobB Sep 30, 2009 12:25PM | link

Agreed with miznic–who cares how you pronounce it. Slurp away and no one will understand you anyway!

BTW, a Vietnamese friend explained the pronunciation of bahn mi as “bah’n meh”. Kind of a sharp emphasis at the end of the “ah” sound, as if there were a silent “d” there. The “meh” part, at least, is easy enough … but I don’t bother trying to pronounce it correctly anyway, since most bahn mi places don’t sell anything else and I can just ask for “one with BBQ pork and one with beef, both extra spicy” or something similar

If you want view full post, please visit Chow.com

People get married year-round, but most large wedding celebrations are held during the spring and summer months. While these weddings are lovely, couples should consider an autumn wedding for the beauty of the season and conveniences of getting married in a less busy wedding period. If you are trying to decide when to get married, you should consider having your

Time Frame

Autumn weddings occur from the months of September through November. These are months with mild and sometimes cold weather, but seldom frigid or uncomfortably cold. These weddings are during the most colorful time of the year when fall foliage is at its most vibrant.

Features

Autumn weddings usually feature colorful autumnal flowers, natural woodsy backdrops, and rich colorful clothing for the wedding party. You can expect to see fall colors such as bronze, rust, burgundy and gold. You can also expect heartier foods than would be served at a spring or summer wedding. Comfort foods and warm drinks are likely to be served.

Misconceptions

Many people believe that most weddings are held in the spring or summer when it is sunny and warm. The truth is however, that 23 percent of all weddings are held in autumn. The fewest amount of weddings are held in the winter.

Benefits

There are many benefits to having a wedding in the fall from being able to take advantage of the mild weather to having a beautiful natural backdrop. Couples who have autumn weddings also have a better pick of wedding venues as wedding hall business slows down prior to the winter.

Warning

While autumn can be the most beautiful time of year, it can also be the time when weather is most volatile. If you live in the Gulf or East coast areas, you will want to consider the high incidents of hurricanes and tornadoes when planning your autumn weddings.

http://forum.goc.vn

The 2009 International Dancesport Championship – Me Trang Cup opened at the Quan Ngua Sports Palace in Hanoi on September 17, drawing the participation of more than 100 duos of domestic and international dancers.

The two-day tournament includes three competition programmes, namely the National Championship, the National Cup for Dancesport Clubs and the Vietnam Open Championship. Couples compete in two categories, including Latin and Standard.

Vietnamese couples who do well at the two national tournaments will be entitled to take part in the Vietnam Open Championship where they will compete with outstanding rivals from 30 countries and territories with developed dancesport communities such as Germany, Russia, Hungary, the Republic of Korea, Malaysia, Japan, the Philippines and China .

On the final night, the organising board will select the 20 most beautiful female dancers to attend the Miss Dancesport Contest.

According to the organising board, the championship offers a good chance for Vietnamese dancers to learn from the experience and expertise of international dancers in preparation for the 3rd Asian Indoor Games, the 25th SEA Games and the 2010 ASIAD.

The championship is jointly organised by the Ministry of Culture, Sports and Tourism, the General Department of Sports, the Vietnam Football Development Company (VFD) and the Me Trang Coffee Company.

en.vietnamplus.vn

Ingredients and preparation

“Phở” is served in a bowl with white rice noodles in clear beef broth, with thin cuts of beef (steak, fatty flank, lean flank, brisket). Variations featuring tendon, tripe, meatballs, chicken leg, chicken breast, or other chicken organs. ‘With the lot’ (made with chicken broth and all or most of the shop’s chicken and cattle offerings, including chicken hearts and livers and beef tripe and tendons) is known as ‘Phở đặc biệt’ (specialty phở). There are also various vegetarian varieties of phở.”Pho bac” is a Hanoi style pho “made with wider, slitherier rice noodles, that was the original version of the dish before is was jazzed up with tripe, brisket, tendon and rare flank steak by Saigon pleasure seekers 70 years ago.

Secret ingredients

In traditional “phở”, there is “sá sùng” (scientific name: sipunculus nudus- a kind of peanut worm) to sweeten the broth. There is another scarce ingredient which is “cà cuống” (scientific name: lethocerus indicus). People use cà cuống oil extract which is spicy and aromatic to add to “phở” bowl.

Varieties of phở by ingredients

# Phở bò tái: “Phở” with half-done beef fillet.
# Phở bò chín nạc:”Phở” with well-done beef brisket.
# Phở bắp bò: “Phở” with beef muscle.
# Phở nạm bò: “Phở” with beef flank.
# Phở gân bò: “Phở” with beef tendon.
# Phở sách bò: “Phở” with beef tripe.
# Phở bò viên: “Phở” with beef meat balls.
# Phở gà: Chicken “phở”.
# Phở sot vang: “Phở” in beef stew soup

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